The Guaranteed, Fail-Safe Method to Create Fun and Amusing Blog Posts Every Time

Q: Reader asks: Jan, I think I’m a funny person. I regularly make others around me convulse with laughter. Yet when it comes time to setting my humor on paper, it always falls flat. Since you’re approachable and kind, would you please share your tips? ~ Frustrated in Poughkeepsie

A: Dear Frustrated: I’d be happy to explain the little I know. As you peruse this information, however, I’d urge you to take advantage of the comedic gift you’ve already been given. “Poughkeepsie” is a name ripe with potential. It’s so much better than the material I’ve been given, such as the boring and commonplace “Vegreville” and “Edmonton.”

To claim your comedic potential, you need only do the following:  

1. Live somewhere north of the 49th parallel where ambient winter temperatures mean frozen boogers. Notice yours in the rearview mirror while driving your son to school. Name it Sarah Palin. 

2.  Have some intense discussions after reading an intense book and writing an intense scene. Realize you’re so serious you’d made a Thomas Hardy novel feel like a laugh a minute. Vow to search out inanity and play.

3. Google “manwhore”.

4. Find this picture:

5. Decide on the topic for a blog post and go to town on it. I mean, write an essay that they’d kill to air on Saturday Night Live. Offer insights in a fresh, vibrant voice that would make David Sedaris feel like a poseur. Envision how his agent will tentatively explain to him there’s a new kid in town and how it’ll eat into David’s book sales and audience size. 

Picture how David will rant, kick a hole in the cardboard box which holds his ARCs and generally signify to one and all his extreme and prejudicial intimidation.

6. Have evil cat hits evil power switch with his dainty, evil foot. Before you’ve saved. 

7. Reboot computer. 

8. Cry. (And by “cry” I mean rant, eat a hole in the supply of chocolate-covered pretzels hidden in the back of the junk cupboard and succumb to extreme and prejudicial intimidation on behalf of the blank screen.)

10. Watch this video to console yourself:

11. Feel remarkably better, cobble together your ramblings and hit “publish”.

How about the rest of you? Any words of advice for my reader?

11 thoughts on “The Guaranteed, Fail-Safe Method to Create Fun and Amusing Blog Posts Every Time

  1. *snort* That squirrel was all I needed. I’m not particularly funny in real life. My brain is too slow. And I fear offending… I’m a sensitive gal and don’t want anybody to be the butt of my jokes… and I’m insecure and don’t want to be the butt of my own jokes. This is a distinctly bad combination for being funny. The only thing I actually have going for me is that I like to be the center of the universe. I think the ace I apply to my blog though, is that I embrace the absurd. And on a COMPUTER screen I can make fun of myself (and my life a little)–it is easier than crying about it.

  2. I’m just realizing I’m probably not very funny, because I want to give Poughkeepsie serious advice when really it would be far funnier to get into the spirit of your blog post and be completely silly! Could the reader put herself into the real life person she is when she’s making everyone laugh and do a role play in her mind? Then convert that to paper. Instead of looking at a blank page and trying to conjure up a funny scenario on a one-dimensional format.

    And maybe look at the squirrel while he/she’s doing it. 🙂

  3. Vegreville — they have the giant Easter egg, right?

    Great post, great tips! If I might add two of my own:

    – You can always edit the post, even after you publish! Take that, paper.
    – Never underestimate the brain’s desire to visualize. Squirrel pyjamas. See, you didn’t expect that, and now you’re picturing them.

  4. Hart, in person I’m booooring and more comfortable as a listener. I don’t generally like to mock other people except, well, one politician *hums a song*, but I’m pretty good about laughing at myself. As long as I instigate it. 😉

    WhatIDesiredtoSay, regretfully, I don’t have a smidgeon of insight into what makes things funny. If I happen to hit that point, it’s by blind, dumb luck. But you’re probably onto something with that living large thing. Also, I’m glad to hear you’re determined to come out of your shell. That “shy” routine you have going would get old very fast. 😉 Thanks for stopping by.

    Deborah, on 99% of my days I would also go into teacher-mode. That is my natural inclination. I’m not quite sure how to conjure a silly mood other than to watch or read something lighthearted. Or hang with the ToolMaster. He’s very good at play, which is one of the reasons I keep him around.

    tamarapaulin, yes! Vegreville does have the largest pysanka in the world. http://www.vegrevillechamber.com/pysankastory.htm
    I also think it’s a lovely, quaint town from the bit I’ve seen of it. The name is a tad silly, though, so I had to use it for the post. And thank you for the contribution! I’m a comment whore just like most every blogger out there. 🙂

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