When I finally got my first e-mail from a fan yesterday, I was so excited. Could it be that my blog had reached a whole new level of success after only two months? I did the Snoopy dance for one full minute.
Then I read the fine print.
Ughh!
Dear Hope101:
I have been an avid follower of your writing career from the beginning, and kudos to you. You’ve come a long way and made a super neat blog. In fact, don’t tell my husband, but I regularly stop by to see if you have posted any new pictures of hunks. More, please, more! lol
There’s just one problem. In all your journals, scribblings and forum postings I haven’t once seen my name mentioned. Do you have something against me or something?
Your one true fan,
Whorehouse
Okaaay, not exactly the reader mail I was expecting. Quite frankly it knocked me for a loop.
But in true hope101 style – what’s the point of having this username if I wallow in self-pity? – I picked myself up after a few minutes and reached for the keyboard. And am I ever glad that I did. For once I began to write, I understood that Whorehouse had just given me a sunlight-dappled opportunity. Why? Because a gracious reply here will demonstrate to both agents and editors that I have:
- mastered the art of the public non-apology
- treated human and inhuman contacts alike, so that someday, when that beast known otherwise as Critic appears, I’ll be fully prepared
With my spirit of willingness revived, I wrote and sent the following letter:
Dear Whorehouse:
I am sorry that you feel I have neglected you in my vast body of literary work. This is where I wish I could say that wasn’t intentional, but that would be a lie. (Note the clever use of honesty?) You see, there’s not much call for using a name such as yours in the contemporary romance genre, and since that’s what I write… Well, I’m sure you can see my dilemma.
But rest assured that your complaint will be at the forefront of my mind. Should I ever actually pen a western romance, I’m sure I can arrange a saloon brawl with the requisite burly hero. Beer will be tossed, manly chests exposed in the mêlée, and in the blistering banter that characterizes my writing, your name shall be mentioned. 😉
Yours in the attitude of Tartitude,
Hope101
So, what do you think? Did I handle this well? Be honest.
I’m also interested in hearing your own PR challenges and how you handled them.
I am quite SURE that you have now found a spot in the hearts of agents and editors everywhere (and in whorehouses, as well).
Thanks for the great post in your usual style!
Hope,
I think your response was perfectly sweet and reasonable. I received a fan email a few weeks back from someone who had read an excerpt to my book which is posted on my site. They wanted to know if the rats (that’s what the book is about) wore shoes. Ummm…
I said rats don’t have thumbs, so making shoes would be a rather difficult task, not to mention tying the laces. I don’t know if the email was from a child or an adult just being silly, but it was fun to answer. I hope I get more and can answer as well as you. I think that last sentence was sort of an accidental pun. 😉
BTW: This did come up on my Blogger Dashboard!
xoxo — Hilary
Laura, how did you get here so darn fast, lol? Thanks again for stopping by and commenting.
Hilary, aw, that’s a rather cute question. Knowing you I’m sure you handled it deftly and with courtesy. And gosh yes, that pun was completely unintentional. Just shows you where my mind is these days. 😉
Also, thanks for the info on the Blogger stuff. There are many corners of the tech world of which I am still completely ignorant.
This is great and your response is both gracious and tarty, a delicious combination!
Thanks, Beki! Appreciate you visiting and leaving a comment. 🙂