You Can Set Your Watch By My Family

Dali's "Profile of Time" from Wikimedia Commons

My iPhone must be on the fritz. That’s the only possible explanation for the following:

•The ToolMaster dislikes video games and tablet computers. They are a sign of rampant consumerism and pander to society’s need for instant gratification. Therefore, when Molly attended a Christmas work party and won a Lenova Thinkpad that she planned to sell, he wouldn’t have bought it for cash.

•He dislikes ebooks. He can’t understand why man would replace a reliable analog technology with one vulnerable to hackers and disruption of the electrical grid. Therefore, he wouldn’t have been gleeful as he downloaded Einstein’s Theory of Relativity from the vantage point of a Kindle app at 11:30 p.m.

•He most certainly wouldn’t have played the preloaded version of Angry Birds. Nor would he have fallen in love.

•For my part, I’ve been scoffing for months about our local bookstore’s transformation. Chapters has forgotten its primary mission. It’s become a toy and housewares shop which happens to contain books.

•Therefore, when I took Frank to stock up on reading material this afternoon, I wouldn’t possibly have purchased this guy…

That’s not him in our kitchen leaning against the bread board, posing for a photo.

Therefore, though it pains me to break my word about never spending another penny on a communication device ever, my iPhone must be malfunctioning and requires urgent replacement.

Good thing we O’Haras are steadfast creatures.

How good are you at predicting your future interests? 

(Speaking of interests, Kim won the RNG draw for S.A. Meade’s Orion Rising. Congrats, Kim! Sue will be in touch soon.)

13 thoughts on “You Can Set Your Watch By My Family

  1. I thought I’d hate eReading, and even when I got my Kindle, I predicted half or less of my reading would be done on it. I am reading a hard cover nonfiction title right now (the first such in many months), and am fighting the urge to complain about its weight and lack of a nightlight to read in bed with one hand. :-/ Still no smart-phone. I’m a conscientous objector to their disruptive nature on human interaction. Just observe a table-full of diners to see how frequent and rampant the disruption can be. Eyes are often downcast, let alone how often the topic of the phones themselves arises.

    1. I bought my iPhone before travelling to my first writing conference. I wanted the combination of camera, email account, and ability to mind my blog, which was new to me at the time. I try to mind my phone manners, particularly because I’m familiar with a phone’s disruptive powers, and for the most part I succeed in staying with my flesh-and-blood company.

      My one difficulty? Avoiding the web when I’m away from home to write but have to have the phone so my kids can reach me. I’m getting better at it, though.

  2. I love all technology (although I don’t think a bookstore should sell toys!), but you’ve opened my eyes to a very serious problem, Jan. While I’ve been decluttering the house and parting ways with dearly loved books that I haven’t opened in 20+ years, your post made me reconsider my actions. What if the power goes out for three days straight? Without my cell, ipad, and kindle, what will I do? What will I read? I’ll no doubt need those 20+ year old books to fill in my time. What a great reason not to part with my treasures!

    1. Oh, Sheila, if you don’t believe in bookstores selling toys — or games, or skateboards, or purses — then don’t go to Chapters/Indigo. It’ll break your heart.

      And though I think you’re being tongue-in-cheek about electrical disruption, the ToolMaster ain’t. And he has a point. Every once in a while my Kindle runs itself out of juice and it’s usually while I’m traveling. An eye-opening experience.

  3. I consider myself lucky to keep on top of my present interests. Give the changes we’ve seen in the last five years, I wouldn’t dare try to make any predictions, although it’s scary how close some of today’s technology is getting to some fanciful things I started writing about five or more years ago. Writing sci-fi is a precarious business!

    1. It’s true, Botanist! I’ve written off-the-cuff remarks to friends about the way I see publishing going, thought it would make a good blog post, but don’t have time to get around to it for a few weeks. Within a few weeks I’ll see another industry leader posting similar thoughts. Even if I’m leading edge, it’s only for a few seconds. 😉

  4. For starters, I bought an Aluratek reader which I loathe and despise. The free book offers weren’t honored and the ebook I’ve managed to successfully download comes up no larger than 2 inches onscreen. I’m hoping for better from Kindle or Nook when I finally get over it enough to try again.

    As for publishing, iUniverse released all three of my novels as ebooks before the reader technology was really up and running. You could download them but the compatibility for ereaders was untested. I’ve been told to expect a re-release of the ebook formats (at no cost to me–iUniverse is a self-publishing company but they’re not billing for this service) so they should be available for popular ereaders in the future. Technology sometimes has to catch up to itself.

    1. I’ve seen those readers in BestBuy, Phyllis, but I knew I needed something simple, especially since the ToolMaster wouldn’t be on board or a resource. I looked at the Nook, but it wasn’t going to be simple to use from inside Canada. The Kindle is about as intuitive as they come, though I dislike their file system.

      Great news about the fee-less re-release for you. Reassuring!

  5. Technology make me feel dumb! And alone in a crowd, but I do love my Kindle. It has saved me countless thousands– well, several hundred– dollars in postage!
    I have a fancy phone and am successful at playing Angry Bird, but not much else. I refuse to allow the device that let’s the police track my every move on my phone. At least I’m prettry sure it’s not working.

    Great post, Jan

    1. I can’t keep up either, Dannie. I tried to see if I could add HBO to our cable network tonight for the Game of Thrones premiere. It was beyond me.

      I’m not sure if I’ve saved money on my Kindle. There are too many ebooks that are more expensive than paper. Also, aren’t you prone to impulse-buying? I certainly am. 🙂

  6. I’m hooked on my Iphone — it’s glued to my hand. I use it to download and listen to audio books in the car, to keep in touch with emails and facebook, to look up restaurants and gas stations — to the point where I try and turn it off on the weekends.

    I’m terrible at predicting my future interests. Every few years I find myself enmeshed in something I swore I’d never do. I guess that means I’m open-minded, right? (Although I still can’t get into Angry Birds.)

    1. I think it’s great to try new things, especially if one was initially opposed. What I find intriguing is how some pursuits, which initially provoke strong antipathy in me, become passionate interests. Strong feelings either way.

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